One problem with Winnie-the-Pooh
Is trying to remember who’s who,
What with Mowgli the cheetah
That rabbit named Peter
And Piglet, the young kangaroo.

Let’s not forget that characters in children’s books are animated largely by the imaginations of the young readers themselves. Perhaps we should excuse a modern-day adult – a human in whom the creative impulse is largely atrophied – for voicing opinions as palpably fatuous as those in today’s bulletin. Especially since Pooh was really Growler in any case.