The last time I spoke to John Wayne
We were trying to hide from the rain;
I think it was him
But his hat had a brim
And there wasn’t much light in that drain.

Isn’t this the pits, though? How much room can there be in that culvert? Why would a macho idol need to hunker down if he’s already wearing his Stetson? Man up, Wayne: give the other guy the hat, or git the hell out of that spillway.