My knowledge is sparser than sparse
So this twenty-page scrawl is a farce.
Oh please, dear examiner
Credit my stamina!
Surely you want me to pass?

As the pollen-count exacerbates the common misery, one is reminded how hay-fever was the go-to excuse for a feeble performance in school and college examinations around this time of year (a personal footnote for the marker, extolling quantity over quality, was a second-string gambit, offered in reckless hope).